Some of you may have noticed the renovations that have happened on the blog recently (okay, I made the changes about half an hour ago). Since we are not 100% decided on our daughter's name yet, I've made the decision to change the "official" title of the blog from The Wren Chronicles to The (Never-Ending) Adoption Chronicles. I suppose it also reflects my feeling that this adoption will never end, that it will never come to fruition. Yes folks, it's been ages since the last referral (at least, since the last referral that was posted on the Yahoo board), and as you know, that tends to get me down. According to one of the recent updates we received from the agency, they anticipate that referrals will resume in the fall, at a steady, if not accelerated, pace. I sure hope that's true. I also hope that we receive our stat dec soon, it's been almost 4 months now that we've been waiting. I suspect that, once we do receive our referral, the wait for court & visa will seem almost quick (though I've heard the reverse - that the wait for a court date & then the visa - is more difficult, because now you know who you're waiting for). So I guess we sit back & wait, some more. Andrew & I have found a name that we both like, I think (when I mentioned the name to him, he said, "that's really nice"), so here's hoping that the search for a name has ended. I won't tell you what it is, because it's possible we'll still change our minds, but I will say that it is African (but not Ethiopian, that I'm aware of).
Not long now to the Great Wisdom Teeth Removal of 2011 (it is taking place on Saturday, 8am). I am trying to keep it together & be positive, but I am freaking out a little, I won't lie. I think it's the anesthesia that's freaking me out more than anything. I will be fine, though. I'm sure I'll be fine. Send me good vibes, though, okay?
Lilypie Birthday tickers
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
What's in a name?
It would seem that I am entering the “questioning what to name our daughter” period of the year. This seems to come around annually, so let’s hope that our girl is home by the time it comes around again, cuz this is driving me crazy.
Growing up I was sure that I would have a girl, and that I would name her Madeline, after my grandma (I was named after both of my grandmas). Having come up against infertility, that dream seemed to go out the window. That’s not to say that Madeline isn’t a beautiful name – it is, I still love it, but it doesn’t seems appropriate for a girl of African heritage. Then, much more recently, I decided that I loved the name Wren (hence the name of the blog), but for some reason, that name has fallen out of my favour recently. Good thing we didn’t tell everybody that was going to be our daughter’s name. Oh wait, we did. Sigh. Now I’m at a loss again. I don’t want her name to be too weird, or too common, and I want to use her Ethiopian name as her middle name. Depending on what her name is, we may even keep it as her first name. I am drawn to names that start with Z, for zome reason, but some of the ones I like are already “taken”, and I seem to be having a bit of time “selling” Andrew on the other ones I like. Some of the Z names you see on websites are just plain odd – Zephyr? Zeppelin? Seriously? Isn’t calling your daughter Zeppelin just setting her up for a lifetime of weight issues? Zoe, I like, and Zala. Now I just have to get Andrew to like one of those names too. Last time he vetoed one of the names I suggested, I asked him what were the names that he liked. He didn’t really have an answer. I want us to agree on this, and to pick a name that we both like, but it’s tough when one of you doesn’t seem to care too much about it.
Speaking of things Ethiopian, our close friends (through adoption) are in Ethiopia as we speak, getting ready for their court date tomorrow. I don’t know if they read this blog, but even if they don’t, I want to put this out into the universe. I hope they pass their court date first go, and that the MOWA letter is ready & waiting for them, so they don’t have to wait to be their little boy’s parents “officially”. I’ve been thinking about them all weekend. I also hope that their first meeting with their boy went well. I can’t wait to be in their shoes.
In other speaking-of-things-Ethiopian news, tomorrow also marks 29 months since our dossier first arrived in Ethiopia. I hope that there aren’t too many more months that pass before we know who our daughter is. In the most recent update, the review of orphanages throughout Ethiopia has resulted in some of them being closed. Apparently, this has resulted in an increase of children coming into the orphanages we work with. While it is not good that so many children need to be in orphanages, this might be bringing us closer to our daughter, and to me, that is a good thing. What is not such a good thing? The current state of our dossier, which is STILL not back in Ethiopia. Apparently, it’s still waiting on the statutory declaration (which, seriously?). It’s been over 3 months now that we’ve been waiting, and I’m hoping that’s because the embassy is busy doing other, more important things, and not because there’s something missing from our paperwork. I’ve been assured that there’s nothing missing, but seriously – it took 3 weeks to get the stat dec the first time around. Three weeks! According to the agency, we can still get a referral because our paperwork is up to date, but I would really love to get that updated stat dec in our file & get it back over to Ethiopia. Does it suck when things like this are out of our control? Yes, yes it does.
In baby’s room news, it’s painted, and we bought the crib this past weekend. Not the mattress, just the crib. About a year ago we bought a dresser from Ikea that was tall & white, because we thought it best fit the vision we had of the room at the time (and it was in our price range). We assembled it a couple of weeks ago, and found it no longer fits our vision of the room. We do have a dresser in the spare bedroom that Andrew has had for ages (at least 20 years) that does fit a lot better into the vision – it’s longer & shorter than the other dresser, and almost matches the bookcase that is already in the room. Best of all, we can use it as a change-table, if we add a baby changing cushiony thing (I can’t remember the actual name). I plan to change the drawer handles from the current plastic bar handle to possibly 2 glass-look knobs per drawer (you know what I’m talking about, they are old school), preferably in green, pink & purple, to match the colour scheme of the room. I will post pictures of the completed room, I promise. We have to wait another week to put the decal on the wall (above the “new” low dresser), then we’ll assemble the crib & we’ll be done. Kind of.
Well, that’s all from here. Until next time, I bid you adieu.
Growing up I was sure that I would have a girl, and that I would name her Madeline, after my grandma (I was named after both of my grandmas). Having come up against infertility, that dream seemed to go out the window. That’s not to say that Madeline isn’t a beautiful name – it is, I still love it, but it doesn’t seems appropriate for a girl of African heritage. Then, much more recently, I decided that I loved the name Wren (hence the name of the blog), but for some reason, that name has fallen out of my favour recently. Good thing we didn’t tell everybody that was going to be our daughter’s name. Oh wait, we did. Sigh. Now I’m at a loss again. I don’t want her name to be too weird, or too common, and I want to use her Ethiopian name as her middle name. Depending on what her name is, we may even keep it as her first name. I am drawn to names that start with Z, for zome reason, but some of the ones I like are already “taken”, and I seem to be having a bit of time “selling” Andrew on the other ones I like. Some of the Z names you see on websites are just plain odd – Zephyr? Zeppelin? Seriously? Isn’t calling your daughter Zeppelin just setting her up for a lifetime of weight issues? Zoe, I like, and Zala. Now I just have to get Andrew to like one of those names too. Last time he vetoed one of the names I suggested, I asked him what were the names that he liked. He didn’t really have an answer. I want us to agree on this, and to pick a name that we both like, but it’s tough when one of you doesn’t seem to care too much about it.
Speaking of things Ethiopian, our close friends (through adoption) are in Ethiopia as we speak, getting ready for their court date tomorrow. I don’t know if they read this blog, but even if they don’t, I want to put this out into the universe. I hope they pass their court date first go, and that the MOWA letter is ready & waiting for them, so they don’t have to wait to be their little boy’s parents “officially”. I’ve been thinking about them all weekend. I also hope that their first meeting with their boy went well. I can’t wait to be in their shoes.
In other speaking-of-things-Ethiopian news, tomorrow also marks 29 months since our dossier first arrived in Ethiopia. I hope that there aren’t too many more months that pass before we know who our daughter is. In the most recent update, the review of orphanages throughout Ethiopia has resulted in some of them being closed. Apparently, this has resulted in an increase of children coming into the orphanages we work with. While it is not good that so many children need to be in orphanages, this might be bringing us closer to our daughter, and to me, that is a good thing. What is not such a good thing? The current state of our dossier, which is STILL not back in Ethiopia. Apparently, it’s still waiting on the statutory declaration (which, seriously?). It’s been over 3 months now that we’ve been waiting, and I’m hoping that’s because the embassy is busy doing other, more important things, and not because there’s something missing from our paperwork. I’ve been assured that there’s nothing missing, but seriously – it took 3 weeks to get the stat dec the first time around. Three weeks! According to the agency, we can still get a referral because our paperwork is up to date, but I would really love to get that updated stat dec in our file & get it back over to Ethiopia. Does it suck when things like this are out of our control? Yes, yes it does.
In baby’s room news, it’s painted, and we bought the crib this past weekend. Not the mattress, just the crib. About a year ago we bought a dresser from Ikea that was tall & white, because we thought it best fit the vision we had of the room at the time (and it was in our price range). We assembled it a couple of weeks ago, and found it no longer fits our vision of the room. We do have a dresser in the spare bedroom that Andrew has had for ages (at least 20 years) that does fit a lot better into the vision – it’s longer & shorter than the other dresser, and almost matches the bookcase that is already in the room. Best of all, we can use it as a change-table, if we add a baby changing cushiony thing (I can’t remember the actual name). I plan to change the drawer handles from the current plastic bar handle to possibly 2 glass-look knobs per drawer (you know what I’m talking about, they are old school), preferably in green, pink & purple, to match the colour scheme of the room. I will post pictures of the completed room, I promise. We have to wait another week to put the decal on the wall (above the “new” low dresser), then we’ll assemble the crib & we’ll be done. Kind of.
Well, that’s all from here. Until next time, I bid you adieu.
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
The Evening Commute - Stinky edition
So, yesterday was Monday. Just an ordinary Monday, with work and all. I shuffled off to my car at the usual time, 3.20pm, in the sweltering heat that has become the new norm here in Southern Ontario (seriously - it's going to be at least 30 degrees Celsius EVERY DAY THIS WEEK). The factory had the day off yesterday, so the usual mad panic to exit the parking lot at that time was non-existant, which was a nice change. It didn't take too long to get onto the highway, and there was the usual amount of traffic. I briefing considered taking the toll road home, but then I thought, just take the highway, you'll save some money. So I stayed on the highway, but I got into the Express lanes, because they are usually faster. Usually. Right around the airport the traffic started to really slow down, which isn't all that unusual. Then it came to a complete stop. One minute turned into 5 minutes, which turned into 10 minutes, which turned into me switching from the CD to the radio to find out exactly what was going on. Turns out there was a fatal accident involving 2 cars & a tractor trailer, and the westbound express lanes of the highway were completely closed. COMPLETELY CLOSED. This was my first highway closure, so I took my lead from the other motorists & turned off my car & opened all the windows. Right about that time I noticed that there was a truck ahead of me, the kind of truck that carries livestock. Stinky, stinky livestock. I wasn't game enough to get close enough to tell exactly what kind of livestock, but I can tell you that it reeked of animal waste. Just what you want to smell when you're stuck on the highway with all your windows open in 36 degree heat. Once in a while there would be a cross breeze that would spirit away the stench, but other than that it was a stink-fest. Turned out we were stopped for 1.5 hours, then it took another hour to get home from there once they started let us by on the shoulder. Normally that part of the trip would take 20 minutes or so, but we all had to gawk at the OTHER fatal accident on the eastbound side of the highway. Seriously. I was drenched in sweat by the time I got home a mere 3 hours after I set out (a trip that usually takes 45 minutes to an hour). And that, dear friends, is why you should always listen to the voice inside you that tells you to take the toll road.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
1,051,200 minutes....
That’s how you measure 2 years. Two years since our world fell apart. Two years since the phone call I received from a fellow prospective adoptive parent, telling me that our agency had gone bankrupt, that the executive director had run off with our money. And it’s been almost 2 years since the families of Imagine Adoption banded together & started the hard work of resurrecting the agency, to bring the phoenix out of the ashes. A lot has happened in these last 2 years, mostly good. About a third of the families that signed back up with the agency back in October of 2009 now have their children home, in their arms, forever, or have been matched with the child that will someday be theirs (including our good friends). The Hayhows, who orchestrated this whole mess, have been charged with fraud & been ordered to appear before the court. Of course she’s hired a high-falutin’ lawyer (way to show that you still have some of our money, devil lady), but the evidence is pretty plain. She took our money, she spent it on herself & her house & her horse & fancy cars that were leased by the agency, and she deprived children, already affected by poverty & the loss of their family, of good, nutritious food. Shame on her. Shame, shame, shame. There is a special place in hell for those such as her.
On a personal level, we’ve started to believe that this will happen for us, that Wren (or whatever we decide to call her) will someday be in our arms, and have started preparing a nest for our little bird. We painted her room last week, a soft green called Spirit Whisper. We assembled her chest of drawers & started loading it with all of the clothes we have for her. All of her teddy bears & her special doll from Uncle Billy & Auntie Jenn are sitting on the bookcase waiting for someone to love them. And soon, her crib will also be waiting for her. Still to be decided – where to put the wall decal we bought for the nursery (it’s in one of my previous posts, it’s a bird-cage with lots of birds flying free out of the cage, I’m too lazy to find the previous post & wouldn’t know how to link it if I did) – on the wall with the dresser or over the crib. Decisions, decisions. And we need to get curtains too. There are already blinds but they don’t block out enough light. And, most importantly, we need to decide on a name. I’m starting to waver on Wren as a first name, maybe it’s too weird & unusual. I’m considering Lily Wren, or Madeline Wren, but the final decision will be made when we know what her Ethiopian name is.
And thanks to Rent for the idea for a fancy name for this post.
On a personal level, we’ve started to believe that this will happen for us, that Wren (or whatever we decide to call her) will someday be in our arms, and have started preparing a nest for our little bird. We painted her room last week, a soft green called Spirit Whisper. We assembled her chest of drawers & started loading it with all of the clothes we have for her. All of her teddy bears & her special doll from Uncle Billy & Auntie Jenn are sitting on the bookcase waiting for someone to love them. And soon, her crib will also be waiting for her. Still to be decided – where to put the wall decal we bought for the nursery (it’s in one of my previous posts, it’s a bird-cage with lots of birds flying free out of the cage, I’m too lazy to find the previous post & wouldn’t know how to link it if I did) – on the wall with the dresser or over the crib. Decisions, decisions. And we need to get curtains too. There are already blinds but they don’t block out enough light. And, most importantly, we need to decide on a name. I’m starting to waver on Wren as a first name, maybe it’s too weird & unusual. I’m considering Lily Wren, or Madeline Wren, but the final decision will be made when we know what her Ethiopian name is.
And thanks to Rent for the idea for a fancy name for this post.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Prognosis – Not Good
I’d like to put out an appeal here for some prayers for Andrew’s good friend Georgia. She’s nearing the end of her fight with cancer. I’m praying that the end will be swift & painless, and for peace for her family & friends. I had so hoped that she would be here when we brought Wren home, and that she would school me in the ways of braiding & general hair care, but unfortunately, her illness isn’t going to allow that to happen. Georgia, we’re really going to miss you & your laughter & your funky dancing & your love for Keanu Reeves. Be at peace, my friend.
Edited to add: Georgia passed away last night (6/28). There's a Georgia-shaped hole in the world, and it sucks. A lot.
Edited to add: Georgia passed away last night (6/28). There's a Georgia-shaped hole in the world, and it sucks. A lot.
Adoption Outlook – Promising
While our referral is still likely to be several months away, there has been movement with referrals (a total of 12 referrals from the beginning of May until today, 4 of those in the last week alone), so the end no longer seems to be quite so far away. There are still approximately 20 families ahead of us with a similar request (that we know about), and about 50 families ahead of us in total. It’s easy to be hopeful right now, when there are referrals, and court dates & visas coming left, right & centre. It’s the rough points, as evidenced by previous posts, that are so hard to handle. It would be so wonderful, so miraculous if I could see my daughter’s face, to know her name, before I turn the big 4-0. I’ve got about 9 months before that happens, so bring it on!
Good times, great taste, less filling
Okay, maybe not less filling. I mean, who am I kidding? This is me we’re talking about. Since the previous bummer of a post, we’ve taken some time to relax & be around friends & family, and I believe it’s done us a world of good. Earlier in the month we spent a Saturday working/playing in a golf tournament. It’s for a charity set up in the name of a friend of my family who was killed in a workplace accident 15 years ago. The funds raised go toward helping handicapped children participate in sports. There’s always fun to be had, seeing everyone again year after year, helping out signing the golfers in & taking the money for the silent auction items people have won, not to mention having a mostly relaxing day looking out over a peaceful golf course out in the countryside. And one of the golfers/contributors, who happens to work at Breyers, always donates a freezer full of ice cream cones, bars & sandwiches, so that doesn’t suck. Heh.
Last weekend we spent the weekend (and part of Monday) visiting my dad’s side of the family in eastern Ontario. It’s always good to see them & reminisce about the good times, and to visit old haunts. We had dinner at my aunt’s (new) house both nights we were there, with most of my dad’s siblings in attendance. The older I get, the more I appreciate my family (and my extended family), it’s great to be able to spend time with them, and it’s really nice to see my dad completely relaxed & at home (he’s pretty tightly wound most of the time). The place that we stay when we go to visit is situated right on the banks of the St Lawrence River, so the view is always amazing. There are gardens & riverside boardwalks everywhere, and the staff now recognize us when we check in (they should – we’ve been staying there once a year for the last 6 or 7 years!). This year we managed to spot a mink fishing for, well, fish. On the way there, Andrew & I always stop at a cheese factory (cheeserie?) just outside of Belleville that makes the best roasted garlic flavoured cheese curds. Like the title says, good times, great taste.
We’re taking some time off after the Canada Day holiday, and we’ll be spending some of it in Niagara Falls (Ontario & NY), so we’re looking forward to that too. Brazilian BBQ, buffalo wings & cross-border shopping are all on the menu (woohoo!). I’d also like to check out the Cheesecake Factory, but we’ll see how that goes. Another item on the agenda is clearing out & painting the baby’s room.
I’ve just thought of something that qualifies as less filling. We completed our veggie garden about 3 weeks ago, adding butternut squash, tomatillos, cilantro & more pak choy to the veggies we’d already planted (spinach, pak choy, purple peppers, eggplant, mint, & red onions, tomatoes & cucumbers). Apparently Basil the garden mouse saw this as a challenge. A mere 3 days after the planting was complete he decimated the tender new pak choy, and the spinach. Sigh, I give up.
Finally, Willow would like to know where her beer is at, yo.
Last weekend we spent the weekend (and part of Monday) visiting my dad’s side of the family in eastern Ontario. It’s always good to see them & reminisce about the good times, and to visit old haunts. We had dinner at my aunt’s (new) house both nights we were there, with most of my dad’s siblings in attendance. The older I get, the more I appreciate my family (and my extended family), it’s great to be able to spend time with them, and it’s really nice to see my dad completely relaxed & at home (he’s pretty tightly wound most of the time). The place that we stay when we go to visit is situated right on the banks of the St Lawrence River, so the view is always amazing. There are gardens & riverside boardwalks everywhere, and the staff now recognize us when we check in (they should – we’ve been staying there once a year for the last 6 or 7 years!). This year we managed to spot a mink fishing for, well, fish. On the way there, Andrew & I always stop at a cheese factory (cheeserie?) just outside of Belleville that makes the best roasted garlic flavoured cheese curds. Like the title says, good times, great taste.
We’re taking some time off after the Canada Day holiday, and we’ll be spending some of it in Niagara Falls (Ontario & NY), so we’re looking forward to that too. Brazilian BBQ, buffalo wings & cross-border shopping are all on the menu (woohoo!). I’d also like to check out the Cheesecake Factory, but we’ll see how that goes. Another item on the agenda is clearing out & painting the baby’s room.
I’ve just thought of something that qualifies as less filling. We completed our veggie garden about 3 weeks ago, adding butternut squash, tomatillos, cilantro & more pak choy to the veggies we’d already planted (spinach, pak choy, purple peppers, eggplant, mint, & red onions, tomatoes & cucumbers). Apparently Basil the garden mouse saw this as a challenge. A mere 3 days after the planting was complete he decimated the tender new pak choy, and the spinach. Sigh, I give up.
Finally, Willow would like to know where her beer is at, yo.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)