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Monday, March 5, 2012

A Boo-Hoo Haiku for You, or 3 years waiting

3 very long years
My heart is numb, anxious, sad
Where is my wee girl?

In honour of the auspicious (?) occasion of our 3 year anniversary of waiting to be matched with our girl, I thought I’d dazzle you all with some poetry. Yes, it’s a haiku, but I have to admit that I’ve been out of school so long that I had to look up the haiku structure online. I guess my brain jettisoned that information long ago to make room for the scads & scads & scads of useless trivia that currently resides in my brain. For example, did you know that the gestation period for a Norway rat (the most common rat in the US) is 3 weeks? I knew that. Why? Who knows.

So yes, it’s been 3 years since our dossier was officially logged into Ethiopia. I never imagined that we’d still be waiting for a match, but if this process has taught me anything, it’s that you can never take anything for granted. That’s true of life in general – things will never happen on your timetable, they will happen when they happen, and not a second before. This wait has brought me many “gifts” – new friends (that is something I will be eternally grateful for), happiness (when our file was approved by the provincial ministry, for example), anger (at various points of the process, which I’ve documented here), anxiety (the suspense of waiting for our match is KILLING me), perspective. Andrew & I marked the occasion by going to the VW dealership (I hit a pothole HARD last week, so we had them check out why there is now a vibration when you’re travelling slowly – turns out the rim is slightly bent on the inside), then to a super-cool health/organic food store (that was mostly for Andrew), then to a nice, leisurely lunch at Milestones. After that I invested in some badly needed workout gear, since I plan to join Crossfit later this month (if I’m going to be a mom, I’d better raise my fitness level above it’s current level of “extreme sloth”). Adoption-wise, referrals haven’t exactly been coming in thick & fast, but the Ethiopian program does seem to move more steadily & “quickly” than many other programs, at least at the moment. At this point, it’s just a matter of being patient & waiting your turn. Easier said than done when your 40th birthday is looming large on the horizon.


CinnamonOpus said...

Good for you. Putting one foot in front of the other is sometimes the hardest thing to do when all you want to do is go hide under the covers. And doing cross fit? That is very very awesome. You and I should make our own little workout group on Fitocracy and give each other virtual fist-bumps every day.

Also, I personally am taking the blame for your not-yet-referral because I am not done knitting. I have things on the needles even as we speak! I'm holding up the works, I admit it! ::hangs head in shame::

Janna said...

I wish it was you holding up our referral, so I could stand over you like a drill sergeant, screaming,"Knit, maggot!". Heh, just kidding - I could never be that mean. No, we haven't gotten a referral yet because there are no girls of our age group to refer. Sigh. I am on board with the virtual fistbumps, though.